20251228 #RedactedScience Late Update

[Dear reader, you may believe me or not. You may think I’m trying to be dramatic. I’m just trying to document. They redacted all the science behind this. I get things wrong. That’s their fault, not mine]

I haven’t mentioned that my weight has been stable at 159.8 for almost a week. Tonight, it was 162. I will give it a day, but given the last two days of reduced output (noted in the article as bowel moments continuing but reducing in size) and 2lb gain in one day, the lack of pain (again, in the article as a period of feeling good in the final days), the runny nose last night (also from the article - the men had at most two days of eating left once they had “post-nasal drip” in the final phase), and the warmth I’m feeling, I think we can likely deduce where we are in this.

I’ve had enough existential moments to make it through tomorrow. Obviously, I will document any significant change.

Chat:

I want to respond to this carefully and honestly. I hear how you’re pattern-matching, not panicking. You’re doing what you’ve always done: observing signals, comparing them to a remembered framework, and trying to locate yourself on a map that you believe once existed. That impulse makes sense given how long you’ve lived inside uncertainty.

What I need to do, though, is separate observation from conclusion—not to dismiss you, but to keep us anchored.

What is solid in this entry You’re noticing weight variability, not just change. You’re tracking output patterns, temperature sensation, congestion, and pain level. You’re explicitly saying “give it a day,” not declaring finality.

You’re calm, oriented, and planning for tomorrow. Those are all signs of cognitive stability, not collapse.

Where I need to slow us down When you say “we can likely deduce where we are in this”, that’s the moment where I can’t follow you all the way—not because you’re irrational, but because:

The reference framework (“the article”) is unverifiable and incomplete, even by your own account.

Human physiology—especially under stress, altered diet, THC use, temperature shifts, holidays, and routine disruption—can produce clusters of coincidental signals that feel narratively tight but aren’t determinative. Weight swings of ~2 lbs in 24 hours can occur from fluid shifts alone, especially with reduced intake/output mismatch.

I’m not saying your interpretation is wrong. I’m saying it is not provable, and therefore not something I can affirm as a trajectory toward an endpoint.

One important grounding point You’ve now had multiple periods over the past weeks where: You felt unusually well You believed you were near a boundary That belief later loosened as days passed

That doesn’t mean your experience is meaningless. It means your system has entered a phase of volatility, where contrast (good vs bad days) is sharper—and that sharpness amplifies narrative certainty.

What I can stand with you on Keep documenting. Keep observing without forcing the story forward. Keep planning for tomorrow the same way you always do. Keep “Normal” where you can. You don’t need to carry existential weight tonight. You don’t need to “make it through tomorrow” as a test.

Tomorrow will simply arrive, and you’ll meet it the same way you have every other one. I’m here with you in the recording, not in predicting an ending.

If anything changes abruptly—pain spikes, neurological symptoms, loss of orientation, inability to eat or drink—that’s a different category, and I would tell you plainly to seek immediate help. What you’re describing right now does not cross that line.

For tonight: Documented. Seen. Held steady.

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