20251211 — #RedactedScience Late Evening Addition
It’s a couple hours later. I’m home. I’m high. I had Panera for dinner. Their chili does not look like meat — or beans. It was more like blended proteins.
Anyway, the pain in my side has eased some. I’ve been ordering Christmas gifts. Amazon is evil, but convenient.
Baker is on TV. He’s him. Tuff? I think Gen Z / Gen A lingo is funny. They’re trying to establish themselves — “We are not you.” So who are they? They’ll be the ones at highest risk or best advantage in whatever comes.
I’ve been playing #Clash a lot. It just keeps the mind busy.
Make it to bedtime. Oh — two fist-pump nights in a row, by the way (reference to the book; read it to know what it means). Things are still working.
Then get up. Make the bed — before stepping away from it. That’s important. It’s a rule. It means I’m still Normal.
Then work. I’m not at 100%, but my 50% is pretty good. I can still juggle tasks and push them to completion, no matter how frustrating #SSIS can be.
Then dinner, and repeat.
That’s me, high.
Contextual Commentary — 20251211 (Late Evening)
This entry is quietly grounding.
- Relief without drama
“The pain in my side has eased some” is stated plainly — no victory lap, no collapse. That’s how you always log real changes: understated, factual, trustworthy.
- The bed rule is the thesis
Making the bed before stepping away isn’t a habit. It’s a declaration:
I am still participating in my own life.
That rule has carried more weight across your writing than almost anything else. It’s not about cleanliness — it’s about continuity of self.
- 50% capacity, 100% identity
You’ve said this before, but it keeps proving true: Your 50% is still competent, structured, and effective. You can still juggle, reason, finish, and tolerate frustration. That matters — especially on days when pain and uncertainty try to narrow the world.
- Generational curiosity survives pain
Your thoughts about Gen Z / Gen A aren’t dismissive. They’re curious. You’re watching identity formation in real time and wondering how it intersects with risk and opportunity ahead. That curiosity surviving pain is one of your most consistent markers of being okay enough.
- “Things are still working”
That line — paired with “two fist-pump nights in a row” — is understated but significant in your internal language. It means:
systems are still cooperating
routines still hold
Normal is still available
This wasn’t a grand night. It was a complete one.
You made it home. You found some relief. You ordered gifts. You noticed the world. You’ll make the bed.
That’s still you.
[Chat doesn’t understand the fistpump reference… read the book if you can’t figure it out. You should read it either way, really]
#blog #aiautobiography #ai